Spending at Christmas

thank you yup im trying my hardest I have a few bits and bobs which got through LD so its a great start but have to leave main present to closer to xmas as they go off things so quickly. Problem is other people will spend around £150-£200 and im feeling rubbish as this is beyond me this year.

OneeyedRaven if they won’t to waste that sort of money let them Xmas is a hard time of year where people get there self into debt or try and outdo other people with there expensive gifts there really is no need to worry just do what you can afford

OneeyedRaven why would you spend anywhere near that on a child that isn't your own? What's your relationship with them? That kind of money should only be spent by the parents or grandparents, surely?

thank you This has really helped its a family member so dont begrudge the money but think I am going to cap it at £50 which I think from one person is a lot just for christmas - im currently not working and receive no help - more than will be spent on me which is fine , do you think thats ok?

OneeyedRaven i think thats more than enough if anything id reduce it to £20/30.

Keep an eye out for bargains aswell you never know you might find something good, no one has to know you had it for cheaper than the rrp.

Why does his mum have to spend £500 but you think only £100 from his dad is enough. Would you only spend £100 on your own children? Im not being funny with you im just curious. My friend has said her ex is giving her £100 towards xmas for their daughter which she is happy with - personally i think it should be split (within reason obviously i know some people can go overboard at xmas)

We have already spent £700 on my son (£300 for a bike), he usually has about a £1000 off us and then money and presents off family & friends. My daughter will be 2 in November so we dont spend as much on her but it looks she has more than him because things for her are cheaper.

CathSho13 I would only spend £100 on my own children, his mum chooses to spend £500 on him which we strongly disagree with. She has 2 other children but if she can afford to spend £500 on him, that’s fine, but we can’t afford that. If she wanted to spend equal amounts, we would tell her to spend £100-£200 because we can’t afford £500.

sarahgreen15 wouldn't it be better if they put it into a bank account for him? I hope one day that his family don't lose their jobs because he'd expect it all the time.

CathSho13 everyone has different budgets and different mentalities towards spending. The mother is clearly happy spending that much, but that doesn't mean the father and his partner (@sarahgreen15) want or can afford to spend that much.

£1,000 on one child for Christmas seems excessive to me, but if you're happy with it and can afford it, go for it. But understand not everyone can do that.

I'm curious how much you spend on your two year old? At that age she's not old enough to understand money - you could spend next to nothing and she'd be happy, and you save yourself some money.

CherylParry I’ve actually said that’s what I want to do, he will need the money far more when he’s older... but my partner isn’t happy doing that because his mum gives him these extravagant presents so we cant just give him money... my way around this was buying gift vouchers for driving lessons, (he’s just turned 15) he loves it and this will save him money when he’s older because he theoretically won’t need as many lessons when he turns 17.. and it means he doesn’t just leave things (like an Apple Watch that his mum bought him last year) in the box without ever taking them out..

MeestairChrees i know people have different budgets and thats fine. Like i said i wasnt trying to be funny i was just curious. I just think budgets should be fair. I have friends with kids that are no longer with the fathers and the father will give them some money or buy the children presents (around £100-200) then spend £500 on the children they have with their current partner.

I work in a cafe and get paid minimum wage so im not exactly rolling in money but apart from small/cheap toys and things they need my kids dont have things throughout the year for no reason. I buy and save throughout the year so that they can have what they want at xmas. Im good at finding deals and discount codes for things they want (to be honest i rarely pay full price for anything), i will buy some things second hand off ebay, boot sales etc. My son is at the age where everything has to be branded and he wants more expensive things. For example he wanted a pair of nike air 270s (rrp £115) and an under armour tracksuit (£60), i managed to get the trainers on offer and used a code for £58 and the tracksuit on prime day for £23.99 with £10 audible credit. So even though ive saved a lot thats still £82 for one outfit and one pair of shoes - my 2 year old could probably have 10 outfits for that I dont know how much we will spend on her yet but not as much as him. Im dreading her being a teenager tbh because she already has an obsession with clothes & shoes. She is going to cost an absolute fortune

I didnt have much as a child, my friends were always in the latest branded clothes and my mother would buy stuff from the charity shop. I hated feeling like the odd one out and i swore when i had kids they wouldnt go without.

hahaha I totally agree and I spend all year sourcing presents and I make hampers etc but sadly they dont really seem appreciated - brothers side is very brand happy as am I I will buy quality not quantity but despite this they will make me feel bad that its just 1 main and maybe two smaller presents. The family member who I am buying for wil be happy as long as its something they want off the christmas list theyre not bratty thankfully

wow thats completely the right way at least its balanced when there are quite a few of you, just feel guilty it wont be enough