Ageism or What? (Update)
Other
Scenario this morning when collecting 3 children to take to 3 address after their parental contact, 2 in cradles, one light, one older and heavy and the third a disabled 4 year old who is too heavy to carry so centre staff come out to get him as we are not insured outside of the vehicle.
Two already in vehicle, went back for the heavy cradle and was met at door by someone around late 30s/40 holding it, who had been asked to bring him out by their own staff.
Her: Can't you manage (carry?) this one?
Me: I find him very heavy but I do manage
Her: Well shouldn't they employ younger people
Me: Not many younger people could fit school times around it if they have children.
Her: Well, not all younger people have children.
Me: I know, but if they didn't they would prefer a full time proper job with more money.
Her: Humph, (and then marched off)
By then we had reached vehicle which is a walk from centre door to car park with her carrying the light bag which I could have taken myself! I was fuming when I got in and driver heard last part. She was so angry she is putting in a complaint.
I have done this job for 11 years and only lately begun to struggle with the heavier babies who cannot yet walk. I always do it and never ask for help. Most people would consider my wage pin money, it certainly does not cover half of my basic living expenses. Also our boss and theirs has agreed that they need to help with the kids in and out as strictly speaking we are only paid to transport them.
Considering the efforts made to accommodate all people whether they be disabled, suffer back pain, and all other manner of things I felt her comments were rude and ageist. B & Q are well know for employing older staff but I doubt they expect the 70 year olds to carry heavy stuff, plus we are all told to work longer these days. I am so angry I suspect people can see smoke coming out of my ears.
You should of said maybe they can employ some people with manners too - give as good as you get and smile!
What a rude and unnecessary comment. Older Babies in car seats can be incredibly heavy to carry and I'm in my 30s.
Midnightflower thank you for that, even the carer who hands him to me at the door (much younger) says she finds it difficult to get him to her car by the front door, let alone from the car park to the centre!
Some people are so rude they think because your getting older you can't do the job next time just say something back and smile 
Not ageist just showing you some concern although I can tell from your message you weren’t impressed. Just accept her help and let her do the lifting and carrying.
Pjran you have misunderstood, she was expecting me to take the child so she didn't have to come out, she made no offer to carry him but went to hand him to me at the door. It was definitely ageist to say we should employ younger people, especially when I said I could manage. Why would you say that? Surely that would have been more acceptable had I asked for help?
My driver has a bad shoulder and cannot lift this child. On arrival I had already gone in with one child and she asked the driver to pass the child from inside the mini bus and was told by driver he was too heavy, it seemed obvious she was assessing our ability to do the job. This is ironic because I have often been asked by the centre staff to take the baby into the contact room as they cannot manage to carry him, every one of them is younger than me! In fact several have asked how I manage as they couldn't do it, I just laugh and say I am used to it after 11 years
Edit: if you read again you will see she said CAN'T you manage not CAN you manage, because someone inside had asked her to bring him out.
I have a tall and heavy 4 year old, I find him hard to carry at times. I used to find it hard to carry his car seat with him in it and I was 29 at the time.
I wonder if she was trying to show concern and it came out wrong? Either way the comment of shouldn't they employ younger people is rather rude.
MrsCraig I would very much like to take her actions/words as concern but when you take into account body language, attitude and voice inflection she was definitely being unkind, even though I continued to be polite and smiled. When we do one child per trip it is fine but they are expected to help when you have 3 or 4 under 5yrs and that should be the case whatever age my colleagues and I are.
I can quite understand you found the car seat heavy as all the foster carers say the same.
MrsCraig I guess if the older ones among us had arthritis, swollen joints, dodgy pins etc then it would be difficult to carry heavy loads and help the little ones on and off mini busses etc. If I got to that stage I would definitely retire but for the time being I am still quite sprightly 
Lynibis I imagine if a member of staff had any real problems carry heavy loads etc then they wouldn't be sent on the mini buses with the children as it would be detrimental to all involved. Just ignore her comments and if she says anything again tell her the reason you do it is because she is too rude to do the job!
You pointed out that you won't be insured outside the vehicle which is a valid point, especially when you are lifting something/someone heavy. Knowing from experience, carrying my son around, when he was in nursery, he was very lazy 
it gave me a really sore back at one point. You shouldn't have been asked in that manner, if anything she should've offered to help, not sure why she brought age into it it just made her look silly x
nina090976 yes a lot of her own younger colleagues have back, shoulder and other problems and often try to avoid helping. In fact it is the two older ladies in their 60s who are most helpful.
I know we're not allowed to call people snowflakes so I will refrain from that, but a lot of our younger generation wouldn't be able to do your job for fear of breaking a nail or something, I like emmas comment as that's exactly what I would've told her, there's nothing better than getting your own back on these types of people by insulting them back with being insulting.
pato yes I agree but I feel I came out of it ok by not answering back.
You are right though, every youngster we've employed during my time has left pronto, even still in bed when driver called for them. Early and late work hours, out in all weathers. Since Covid ended I have caught so many bugs from the kids but I still enjoy interacting with them. Getting a giggle from a baby makes my day, as does teaching the toddlers a rhyme. As I said above only older folk want this job as it is not salaried, we get paid per job and certainly not enough to live on, just to supplement pension.
Lynibis You probably did, I know that you get a lot of joy out of your job and that you do it children, if it wasn't for kind hearted people like yourself doing those jobs, nobody would especially not for a pittance, it says a lot about you as a person, that you still put them all first.
pato that is a very kind and lovely thing for you to say. I am just a normal person but I think understanding of human nature sometimes comes with age. It doesn't make me immune to thinking mean thoughts sometimes but I have always loved kids and hate to see what some adults do to them. They spend lots of time with us on transport and it is every adults duty to make sure these kids especially know only kindness even if their parents have let them down. Even my 56 year old male boss joins in a sing song with us when he does a spot of relief driving!
It gets worse! I mentioned above my 56 year old boss but he is no longer the boss although I still call him that out of habit. For over a year we have had a 30 year old as the boss (29 when he took over). Occasionally he has to do a driving job and when I worked as his PA last week he asked me when I was thinking of retiring. I didn't think you were allowed to ask that?
My usual lady driver then told me he had asked her when she thought I might be retiring. For the last 3 or 4 months I have been given much less work and I am beginning to wonder if a bit of constructive dismissal is going on.
As I have said previously I am still healthy and sprightly, I can do the job as well as, if not better, than many younger colleagues and I am getting quite upset by the fact that he has taken on two more women from school runs (already earning) and is giving them mine and another colleagues work. The whole situation is becoming unbearable but I feel unable to say anything as he has previously inferred to staff 'if you don't like it you know what to do'!
Lynibis I can't speak for other industries but in hospitality that's a pretty common tactic to get staff to leave on their own accord. I think Pjran advice is a good idea. I hope you get it sorted, age shouldn't matter as long as you can do your job.
Midnightflower and Pjran I would definitely take that route if I could but there is no one higher as the council dishes out the contracts to best bidder but have no say in the running of the company except for the health and safety of the children, car seats etc. Spot checks are done.
I started in 2011 and the pay was £5 local and £6 out of local, most of the jobs took over an hour sometimes 90 mins and less than min wage. We didn't get a pay rise until 2021 so 10 years! At least the new boss sorted that. Being single I have been able to jump out of bed to cover school runs, do late evening when a child's transport has been forgotten and sometimes been eating a meal and dashed out. But it seems loyalty counts for nothing. I am also self employed so that doesn't help
Lynibis Acas and the equality advisory & surport service both have phone lines you can call and discuss issues with. They maybe able to help.
I don't understand human behaviour. This lady, despite the fact that I was not rude to her at all, now totally ignores me when I drop children at the centre. No complaint was made by me, I don't believe in reporting people for a one off rude comment. I held the door open for someone holding a child and she just also walked through without a glance or thank you. I thought people only acted like that on tv or in books.
On the work side, had a chat with the previous boss, the older one, as he still does the work rotas, he reassured me that nothing has been said about wanting me to leave. He explained a few things and since then I have had back many of the jobs I had lost.
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